Let's hear them.

I'm interested in making a number of short animations with some of the best ones, and I'll of course give you a writing thanks if you'll oblige me.

I've also made a rough test to give you an impression of what it might come across like.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Yqe9HsTNuU

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Well this morning I left my house at 8:30 and ran to the station. I instantly got a seat and sat and enjoyed my book. Then I got off the train and prompt walked to work. Got in the office stylishly on-time at 9:05.

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Lies - No one gets a seat on the central line

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Well, I took the Victoria line from Brixton once and didn't get stabbed. That's a triumph in my book.

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Here's mine.

When I was a young man, I had a job that required me to wear a suit and tie (incidental, but scene-setting... I look all smart 'n' stuff). I got my tube home from Tottenham Court Road each evening, and as I'm walking down the steps onto the platform - with the train waiting - I hear the buzz as the doors start to close. I sprint forward, fling myself at the door and manage - I'm not quite definite how - to end up on my backside on the platform with my leg jammed in the closing door. I lie there for a few seconds. The door opens. I get on my feet, walk into the carriage, and look up.

Everyone. Everyone is staring at me. 300 people, packed carriage, plus - to a man and woman - they've all caught this ad hoc piece of sub Cirque du Soleil. And then somebody starts clapping, and the whole carriage goes off in a round of more or less good-natured laughter with applause. What can you do except bow, as elegantly and genially as possible? Still smirk when I think about it.

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One morning this lass clearly doing the train ride of shame. Was calling all her friends saying how she was so aggravated by one the guys in the group that night and how he was following her all over and would not leave her alone and how she did not want to go out if he was ever there.

This was nevertheless the guy she banged last night. He sent her packing first thing in the morning.

I'm not truly sure if she was being intelligent or stupid.

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I unintentionally sodomized some chick when the coach came to an sudden halt.

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If you're sitting in a finishing point for about the time between trains leaving minus ten seconds then it can be possible. But then you're sitting in a terminus, with the doors open.

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I got a girls number once.

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My Northern Line from Old Street was delayed as a homeless person (or hipster; hard to tell; but did look homeless) had one foot in the door, blocking it; he was balancing by the other foot; one of his hands was serving Stella Artois to his face; the other hand was making a salutation to tone with his yelling of HITLER! HEIL HITLER! until somebody pulled him out of the door.

All in all a quite normal Thursday

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